Mistica Chronicles

Welcome to Issue 73
Created by The Mistic Pets Team

Summer Heat Wave Hits Mistica
Written By Fallout

Grab your hand fans and crank up your AC's, because Mistica is experiencing the hottest heat wave since the Great Heatening of '93! Residents of Blizzard's Realm are reporting bits of green popping through the snow while the anya priestesses of Ravi-Sorin have noticed spots where the sand is beginning to melt into glass as intense heat engulfs the planet.

As temperatures spike, pools grow more and more crowded, sidewalks have become littered with eggs and melted popsicles, and people actually started visiting the library because it's pretty much the only place in town where you can loiter around that has free air conditioning. Stores all over have quickly run out of milk, water, and bread as Misticans fearing the worst stock up for the upcoming apocalypse.

“I'm not really complaining. It's good for business,” says Freezy Treats owner, Sebastian the emperon. To help beat the heat, Freezy Treats is offering free cups of sherbet to customers throughout the day while supplies last.

When asked for an explanation as to the cause of the intense heat wave, a very important looking scientist had this to say: “I dunno. I guess someone finally changed the sun's lightbulb or something.” Shortly after this statement was collected, a security guard reminded our reporters that this man was actually the weather lab's janitor and not a real scientist.

An actual for-real scientist recommends staying out of the sun or finding ways to keep cool. “Drink plenty of water to avoid dehydration and pray to Pandoria that fall will come swiftly,” he further explains.

One can only hope that she'll answer those prayers and speed up time.


Written By Leptonyx

Can I have two cups of sherbet please?

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